I may not like you…
27th March, 2010 - Posted by seb22277 - 13 Comments
I walked in the door last night to find a group of teenage boys huddled around my son’s X-Box. They sprawled on my furniture in a floppy mess of assorted crumbs, plastic wrappers and empty soda cans.
I smiled at them fondly. These kids have been my child’s friends since they were in kindergarten.
A line from a long forgotten prayer drifted through my mind: “May you walk with good companions.” My son is lucky to have found good companions. So am I.
I feel fortunate to have found a group of authors to walk with me on my writing road. Because no one else understands.
My husband is my biggest fan, Since the day we met over thirty years ago, he has firmly believed there’s nothing I can’t do. My parents and sisters and friends are there to cheer me on and genuinely enjoymy success.
And they don’t understand either. Only another writer gets it.
Only another writer knows what it’s like to take the formless lump of a story idea and chip away at it until you’re not even sure it’s finished—you only know you can’t stand to work on for it one more minute.
There’s a bond between authors. A kinship.
This is the not the same as liking every fellow author. Some of them are seriously annoying. They know it all, talk too much or not at all, are too controlling or too passive, and generally display the myriad of personality types found in any large group.
But the minute they start to talk writing, none of it matters. From computer frustration to flashes of inspiration, I know them. And they know me. I’m in excellent company.
And now for the secret question: Who is walking your writing path with you? Who gets it? Let’s celebrate our own good companions!
Posted on: March 27, 2010
Filed under: A Writer's Life
13 Comments
Traci
March 27th, 2010 at 9:20 am
Great post – I so knew that scene you just described!! My friends at FRW, of course, my friend Sheryl and my hubby – for plotting and going ‘what if’ with me for hours on end…my fellow Babes. I have been blessed with lots of wonderful company on the writing path
Mary
March 27th, 2010 at 9:56 am
I agree. No one understands like another writer…kind of like describing labor to someone who’s never experienced it. The highs, the lows – they’re all part of the process. I attend FRWA and MWA and don’t write either genre, but I enjoy being around other writers and hearing what they have to say.
Barbara Silkstone
March 27th, 2010 at 10:22 am
I so agree. I started writing before the internet was in full bloom (I was a toddler.) Back then when I attended writers conferences it was like greeting lost family. We all took honest delight in our varied accomplishments. It’s even better now with email. I can’t wait to tell my writer friends about the latest ups and downs. I know they’ll get it. Unlike my childhood friends who try but just don’t share that passion, my writer pals will always “get it.”
Buck
March 27th, 2010 at 10:55 am
Excellent point. One other thing about writers is that in spite of whatever faults they might have, most of them are pretty nice people.
Patrice Wilton
March 27th, 2010 at 11:10 am
So true, Suzanne! I love the formless lump of a story part – too funny. Your husband sounds like a gem, but it’s true, no one, NO ONE, can understand why we do what we do. NOT EVEN ME! Are we crazy or what? This passion we all share is sometimes exhilerating, more often frustrating, and endlessly heart-breaking, but we stick with it year after year. I’m leaving now to go have my head examined!
Cynthia Thomason
March 27th, 2010 at 11:49 am
Wonderful post, Suzanne, and so true. My writing friends have been with me for almost as long now as my former teacher friends, and the relationships just keep getting stronger. Only a fellow writer can understand the jubilation at the words “the end” even though we know that if we look at that page one just one more time, we’ll change something!
Jan Washburn
March 27th, 2010 at 12:44 pm
I know what you mean when you say your husband was your biggest fan. Unfortunately my husband was no help at all as a critic. He thought everything I wrote was fantastic – or else he lied a lot. But he certainly was encouraging.
Lynn Hallberg
March 27th, 2010 at 12:57 pm
The bond you share with your writing friends is totally different than any others. They “get” sitting alone for hours in an imaginary world with imaginary people. And critique partners…they become your sisters.
Allison Chase
March 27th, 2010 at 3:58 pm
I couldn’t have gotten so far without being a member of FRW, but when it comes to the weekly grind of producing material when it would be easier to do other things, and to keeping my sanity in this business, I really depend on my critique group. They are my sisters in writing! We’ve been together a long time and together we’ve celebrated our victories and mourned our losses. We motivate each other and cheer each other on. I can’t imagine trying to do this without them.
Mary Ricksen
March 27th, 2010 at 5:03 pm
Fellow authors saved me. They gave me credit for more then they should have. They supported me, make me smile, and lift my spirits. I couldn’t say it any better then the talented authors who commented before me. But, did I tell you this, without my writing friends, I’d never leave home. They make life complete for me. All of them!
Pearl Wolf
March 28th, 2010 at 4:46 am
I made the mistake of showing the first draft of my first novel to someone I thought was a supportive ‘friend.’ She shot me down with a curt comment about it “needing work.” I learned from this mistake by choosing my friends from the supportive writing community. You’re so on traget! Good luck, Pearl
Kristin W.
March 29th, 2010 at 12:00 pm
I’ve always found it amazing how women (and men) from such different backgrounds, ethnicities, ages, marital status, religious, economic, whatever can come together and none of it matters once the topic turns to writing. It doesn’t matter what genre we write in either. It’s a shared experience that – like you said – only we understand. Maybe other artists get it. Anyone who creates something from nothing, be it a painting or a singer/songwriter I think comes from the same essential place.
Nancy Cohen
April 6th, 2010 at 1:50 am
This is so true. Only other writers understand the joys and angst of this career, the sacrifices, the dedicated hard work. I commune on a level with my fellow writers that a non-writer can’t go. It doesn’t matter what our individual backgrounds are because we all share the same experience. My critique partners are my saviors in this business. Without them, I wouldn’t have gotten where I am nor would I have staying power. And FRW is like a big family. We’re all there for each other.
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